BEDTIME ISLAND #1

BEDTIME ISLAND #1

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Trouble sleeping? Join the club, frembino. Once you realize a bed resembles just a soft kind of a table, you can't quite help considering bedtime DINNERtime--and YOU'RE what's for dinner. (And your NIGHTMARES are doing the eating.) With all the nonsense happening in the world today only a NARC could accomplish a good eight hour's kip. And thankfully for YOU, I'm not a narc. So you should probably listen to me when I tell you about Bedtime Island.

I'VE been going to Bedtime Island every night for five YEARS. It RULES. You want some mindblow? Get this: You can go there, too. Anybody can.

Consider your chosen fainting platform a Bedtime Boat, bound for the moonlit sands of Dolphin Beach. Just don't forget your passport.

And your passport is a T-SHIRT! Bedtime Island The T-Shirt, made of one hundred percent habit-forming cotton. Add Bedtime Island The T-Shirt TO--or substitute it FOR--your preexisting dreamtime costume, and EVERY not-a-doctor at Action Button guaranTEES you the friendliest possible everynight's oblivion in the company of ALL your favorite Bedtime Island Residents!

* The Bibblings, Bibbis and Biffis!
* Floppy Bloppy the Boneless Pony!
*The Strawbuddies--Strubby *and* Jellby!
* BabyChild and their meetable-only-in-lucid-dreams imaginary OR time-traveling ten-year-future self, BigFriend!
* Hugby Tenderson is also here!
* Wow! Is that Pwumpy Da ICE CREAM Goose???
* Will Pippitha Penkleton show up? I actually don't know
* "What about Bolognio The Teacup Donkey???" Yeah, I hear your questions. Lord, why are you all so obsessed with Bolognio The Teacup Donkey? Why did HE get so popular?

You can wear ALL these friends--for the cost of however much it says this shirt costs when you visit Shop Dot Action Button Dot Net. Consider the price a surprise!

To ensure the loosest and most relaxed possible fit, we recommend you purchase Bedtime Island the T-shirt in a size larger than you normally wear. (Our video advertisement says the shirt comes only in sizes large and up. While funny as a joke, I realize I don't want to stop anybody from buying one of these for their tiny child lmao)

If you don't ACT NOW we *might* not even Photoshop in Pippitha Penkleton OR Bolognio The Teacup Donkey! See if YOU can find them.

Depending on where you live you might be legally required to also purchase a Bedtime Island The T-shirt for anyone else who sleeps in the same bed as you. Ask your lawyer for details.

You MUST wear Bedtime Island The T-Shirt every night for maximum effect. (Do NOT tell your doctor I said that.)

If I see you wearing Bedtime Island The T-Shirt on the street I will yell at you. Bedtime Island the T-Shirt is For Home Use Only. (Don't let that stop you from recommending Bedtime Island The T-Shirt to your friends.)

Bibbis likes bedtime because she gets to watch TV before bed. Biffis likes bedtime because he gets to eat breakfast when he wakes up. YOU like bedtime because you get to wear this T-Shirt--if you DARE.

(PRESS RELEASE. FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: Action Button Entertainment, LLC, a limited liability corporation with offices located on the Petty Heck Archipelago, announces launch of new lifestyle brand "BEDTIME ISLAND". Featuring character designs and illustrations by Jenny "Mimsy ('The Punk')" Jiao Hsia based on worldbuilding concepts and characters by Tim "Action Button" Rogers, "BEDTIME ISLAND" looks to disrupt the sleep industry, introduce YOUR children to lucid dreaming as an activity More Fun Than Fortnite, and also tie in to something quite excellent that you might not see for about six more years)